my heart looks like your heart

my heart looks like your heart

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

where you are not

One day you wake up and there you are.

It doesn't happen overnight
when you get lost
in your own home

Among the floors you know so well
that your feet can walk them 
in the pitch dark
to get that single glass
of quiet water
in the middle
of the long still night
that just won't end

Inside the walls that keep you sheltered
and hold you in
from everything
and everywhere
that you seek

Underneath the sounds
of every bruise
and breaking of your spirit
that have stolen your peace
shifted the soil
and changed the terrain
of your soul

Behind the windows you have looked through
for so long
that you no longer see the outside,
only your reflection
reminding you
of where you are

and where

you are not.

Monday, May 12, 2014

pieces of me ... letters to my children

someone recently said to me that she believed in my conviction, in my own belief in the words i spoke to her, because she knows that i always speak directly from my heart.
this person remembered things i had talked about and written about almost a decade ago, which isn't a long time in the big picture of things, i realize this, but it surprised me and i felt honored not only to be her friend, but also to discover that part of me lived inside another person in this way.

also recently i was thinking about how when somebody leaves our side, regardless of reason or circumstance, it is helpful to be able to have something of theirs that is tangible ... whether we hold an item that belongs to them, or have a tattoo as a way of keeping and carrying their permanent presence, or sometimes words that they have written that speak from their heart and live in ours (sometimes both!)

i know that many of us have been in situations where we find ourselves going back and reading things that someone we love once wrote to us.  it is not always possible to define the peace or love that this can bring to us, often during moments when we need it most, in order just to find our very next breath.

i also then started thinking about my children, and when they will be grown and away from me.  and i wanted them to have pieces of me any time they want.  pieces of my heart.  pieces of my spirit.  words that they know come from the very center of who i am.  i decided to start writing something every day, (this is my plan) and consolidate everything in one place.  whatever is on my mind.  random thoughts.  random feelings.  i have set no rules ... i am not a rules person and i don't like being told what to do ... apparently not even by myself!  just something i can give to my boys one day.  maybe they won't want this or need this, and that's okay too.  still i want to offer it because, well, we just never know what life is going to throw our way,
and i know what it's like to feel alone
and need a piece of a person,
when i can't have the whole person,
in person ...

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

when i say i love you ...

when i say i love you 
it means you have someone who
will encourage you
when you feel you have failed,
is proud of you
when you feel shamed,
supports you
when you feel weak,
believes in you
when you are swimming recklessly in doubt,
wants you
when you feel undesirable,
is grateful for you
when you feel unworthy,
wants what's best for you
even when it hurts,
will remind you of your greatness
when you have forgotten your significance,
will heal you
when no one else can even tell that you are wounded,
and understands you
when nothing in your entire world makes any sense at all. 

when i say i love you
it means you have
love without conditions, 
love without limits,
love without fail.

when i say i love you
it is not because of what you have done, what you are doing, or what you will do. 
it is because of who you have been,
who you are,
and every single bit of who you are still yet to be.

Saturday, May 3, 2014

celebrate your baby steps!

sometimes in life we take leaps.
we take fabulous little baby steps.
celebrate YOUR baby steps
even if you are the only one applauding!

“Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.”  -Harriet Beecher Stowe

to read my latest article:

with photography by Carpe Diem Artography

celebrating our baby steps is on